The time has come. If the bush is out of control – hint it’s poking out of your underwear or to quote Billy Connolly you could add some pigtails and call him Willy Nelson – some care is required. You don’t have to wax it away Brazilian style – unless you want to of course. Nor do you have to go through the pain and expense of lasers. But, just as you like your partner to have a tidy up downstairs, so too the other way around. Reciprocation is key to a healthy relationship.
What you need are clippers. Clippers designed for the body to do the heavy lifting. Especially if you’ve never gone downtown before or the hair is particularly heavy. Go for a uniform look by taking off small lengths at a time. You can always remove more but you can’t instantly replace what’s been cut.
Next, scissors are required for the detailed work which will seal the deal. And we mean a dedicated pair of scissors that’s not used anywhere else in the house. The main reason is hygiene as there are bacteria in the groinal – what, it’s a word – region which you don’t want near your food prep area or anywhere else for that matter. A good set of moustache scissors will do the trick. Ensure the scissors are clean and disinfected before you start. If you don’t have any Dettol handy, run the scissors under boiling water.
Then have a shower. Just as the hair on your head is easier to cut when damp, the pubes are too. The water is a natural lubricant but don’t go in with only H2O on your side. A clear shaving gel for sensitive skin that contains little to no alcohol, plus healing ingredients like chamomile, is a scrote’s best friend.
Shave in the direction of hair growth to avoid ingrown hairs and snag. The result will be a lot smoother.
When it comes to the balls, use your non-dominant hand to stretch the skin taut and slowly, carefully, use long, even strokes. You can use trimmers, razors or scissors, but ensure the area is well lit so you can see exactly where you’re going.
If you do get a nick – and you probably will the first few times – apply pressure to the area for 10 minutes. Not helping? You may wanna get yourself to the hospital. We mean it. Either way, dress the area with warm water and an antiseptic cream.
To deal with the inevitable itch – trust us on this – moisturise daily, as this will reduce irritation.
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We like:
Philips Bodygroom Series 7000 Showerproof Body Groomer
Dovo Solingen Beard and Moustache Scissors
Recipe for men clear shave gel
