Here at MISTR, we firmly believe it’s about nailing the basics. Cleanse, moisturise, and maybe add a serum or styling product. Finish off with a scent. No more than that.

But the business of appearance is a curious one. Vanity knows no bounds and as long as there is someone who’ll pay for it, providers will oblige. Welcome to some of the weirder ones…

If you’ve grown your hair a tad, you’ll have dealt with split ends and flyaways – those pesky bastards that your product seems to miss. According to the Brazilian technique of velaterapia, offending strands are burnt away with a candle. It’s a land that knows a thing or two about hair removal so we’ll give ‘em this one.

Not so much the redheads who’ve been known to use cranberry juice masks to keep the colour lustrous. Too natural? Celebs like model Suki Waterhouse opt for a cup of Coke as a rinse.

Which brings us to Gwyneth Paltrow – she of the steamed vagina – who recently stumped for apitherapy, aka bee stings, to combat scarring and skin inflammation.

If you think oil pulling – basically swirling a tablespoon of extra virgin around the mouth for 20 minutes – to boost oral health is odd, may we suggest apple cider vinegar as a cleanser? Or maybe brushing your teeth with strawberries?

Not freaky enough for you? How about a snail facial. No it’s not some very specific area of the dark web. Rather it involves snails crawling about on your face. Luckily (for some), their mucus is high in antioxidants and hyaluronic acid.

If that doesn’t quite appeal, what do you reckon of the nightingale poo variation? We shit you not.

Still, nothing – although modern leeching comes a close second – beats the vampire facial where blood is drawn from the arm, centrifuged so that the platelets are enriched and then injected into the face. We implore you to give ‘em a go. After all, what’s the worst that could happen?